YG - Toot It and Boot It (2010)

English speakers have come up with an awful lot of silly synonyms for sexual intercourse, and though it has some tough competition from old standbys like “boink,” and “pork,” “toot” might have achieved a new low when it comes to erotic lexicography. Even so, a narrative capped with “I toot it and boot it” is awfully enjoyable when it takes the form of a pop song, and this goofy, nursery rhyme-like title sure is fun to sing along with.

It’s helped by bass thumps and a breezy piano sample (from — where? It reminds me of the Commodores flip in Cam’ron’s “Hey Ma,” but I really have no idea) that screams Southern California: a sunny lope of a beat with no real direction and nowhere at all to go. This is a tune in which the “whoa-oh” chants aren’t starting a party, they’re just throwing another burger on the grill and grabbing another cold one out of the cooler.

To toot it and boot it means, should you not have realized, to have a one night stand, and there are plenty of ways to present such an occasion as pleasurable for everyone involved. YG does not; he in fact goes out of his way to humiliate his partner. She hoped it might be something long term, you see, and sure, misunderstandings happen. But it’s kind of weird; “I toot it and boot it,” he raps, before appending proudly, “And made her feel stupid.” As if that were the entire point of, erm, tooting.

It’s a pretty mean thing to do to someone, and there are plenty of songs to be written about how it feels to be on the receiving end of such treatment. But YG describes proceedings with a roguish amiability rather than maliciousness. That doesn’t make him a nice guy — just a charming one — but no one’s pretending he’s nice. Treat it as a cautionary tale, perhaps, or treat it as a bad boy grinning “Ain’t I a stinker?” Or perhaps just treat it as an opportune moment to sing a silly chorus. Woah-oh-oh.